Feed Back, Comments, Q & A

C: Your comments openly dismiss the supposed white magick or most any other magick that isn’t dark as being misguided

A: Magick is not misguided. It’s only people that are and how they are applying magick. Magick started out as serious business. Now it has become many things it was never intended to be. If I go to my Dr. because i have a problem and he gives some meds or otherwise cures me, has he performed white magick on me? Kindness, compassion,healing and other related things do not belong solely to the realm of white magick. They belong to everyone wise enough to apply it accordingly.

C: and you claim to be balanced while you have walked an extremely dark path yourself, I wonder if you have been influenced by your environment.

A: Of course I have been influenced by my environment. The goal of darkness is to transcend though, not confine permanently.
Actually, I do not claim to be totally balanced yet, because I am not. I know more than most people, therefore I am more informed,ie, less ignorant than they are. If I was complete I would not be here any longer. I would have reached the final goal. I still have a lot of work to do. Part of the balancing process is to integrate the knowledge that you have accumulated, and apply it. Not because you 'have to' but because it will become reality and your true nature. Therefore it will come naturally.

C: I know personally that any number of points of view can arrive at the same conclusion yet you have degraded others, I hate Christianity but I also respect it and know that their view of life will be different but I and a priest (from experience) have ended up at the same place.

A: I do not seek people out to degrade on purpose. It’s these same people who call me evil and foolish which intentionally seek me out or go out of their way to bash me out of their own ignorance and foolishness. I do not hide as they do. My thoughts, personal parts of my life story etc. etc. are here for all to read. That takes courage if you ask me. I am not one to openly share any personal info about myself or my ordeals. This sharing has come over time. Because of my interaction with a wide range of people over the past few years ( because of my web site mostly) I have learned more about how to interact with people, and I have also copped an attitude problem. I do not appreciate the constant attacks. I didn’t ask for it but I have to deal with it now. I am still learning how to deal with it. I recognize the fact that I have an attitude problem. Now I can start to work on it. I wish to rise above the garbage that these people dish out and the filth of who/ what they are, not become like them. If I was to remain in my own private world, I would have never known about this side of me or perhaps created this side of myself. But by doing so I have even more experience. Now I can weed out the new garbage of my own life, because of the idiots, and become even more evolved with time.
I respect some of the intended teachings of Christianity, but I do not respect organized religion because of what it has done to people.

In regards to my anger problem: Do you know what makes me angry? Ignorance and purposeful stupidity. I am not always angry because I am constantly attacked. I am angry because I am being attacked via ignorance and sometimes prejudice.

C: You claim to have spoken to many demons/angels and said that you paid a blood penance to enter the underworld(wrist slashing), I dont feel that a being of good intent would make this happen.

A: I didn’t slash my wrist. I wasn’t even trying to kill myself. The blood part of entering is just a fact. It has nothing to do with anyones intent, good, bad or anything in between. It's just the fact. The whole issue of who and what they are and what the whole real deal on darkness is about has been covered by me over and over again throughout my writings, so I will not discuss it now because it will be overkill..to repetitive.

C: Guardians of knowledge yes I can agree with that but to ruin ones life to what extent is unknown and the punishment of weakness/ignorance is malicious.

A: Now wait a minute here... I have covered this a lot as well. The "ruining" of ones life is pretty much the point. How will you know whats really going on with yourself if everything is peachy keen? Besides, it only looks as if it’s being ruined. You are actually being recreated.
Ignorance should be punished, and it usually is. That's how some people learn.

C: And what are the motives of these dark divine, surely there must be something we do not understand about them and the underworld,

A: That basically the whole point of my work, to reveal what is unknown about them and misunderstood.

C: some people view extreme pain and sadism as beauty, I dont know what you saw but from the experiences you have went through and the influence of the darkness your vision of beauty is probably something foreign to me, maybe even frightening.

A: Perceptions of beauty can and should change as we change. You have to look beyond the obvious sometimes in order to really see the beauty. Some of my perceptions of beauty is what many people would find repulsive or insane I’m sure.

C: And the darkness is not complete balance and anyone who claims to be complete balance is somewhat misguided.

A: The darkness by itself is not balance, its only the other side. But it is only here that we may embark upon the path towards wholeness.

C: You have chosen a side(darkness) and you personify this, you might share common ground with others but in the end you will always be something more than others, for you its darkness. I myself know that no one can be the balance they sometimes claim, our actions and mindsets are only to human and will pick up on one trait more thus creating an imbalance, we can still be informed and experience variety but our core will emanate the light or the dark more then the other.

A: Ah, very, very true! This is where we can learn to recognize our faults and new defects and then work on them to eliminate them.
C: And this is my problem, you have been influenced by darkness and I know this for certain, you cannot live in something without it taking its toll on you.

A: That is common sense. It certainly takes a huge toll. Some people will cope with it and process the whole of the ordeal, and others will not and therefore become completely insane and useless. If it was easy, everyone would be doing it.

C: I have not made up my mind yet and constantly switch between the light and the dark when I see something I like but here is where I want to make my stand and choose. I want to know what this darkness has done to you and the traits you have developed because of it.

A: Your looking at it in the wrong way. You dont have to chose between anything. Ask yourself this instead: Do you want to learn and/or become illuminated someday, or do you want to always be stuck between two principles that are one and the same, by not combining them.

C: I see something primal in what you describe and some of it frightens me.

A: It is primal. It is terrifying. You will have to learn to deal with it . Anything worthwhile comes with a price.

C: So what is the nature of this darkness,

A: Darkness is the source and means of regeneration for starters.
C: I am compassionate and although I might use stern methods it is all for the well being of others.

A: I am not a monster actually. Respectfully I ask, how do you know what is best for the overall well being of others? If you are undecided about positive and negative and have not learned about the results of their combination, you can not know what is best for yourself, let alone involve what is best for others. Often what is best for us, is not what we will percieve as good for us.

C: I strive for peace but know that conflict must be there for the peace to mean anything and I think your darkness is based on those aspects of life that have a slight repulsion in me; sadism, sacrifice of life, hatred.

A: Hatred? No. Animosity towards repression. Yes. Correcting the situation, yes. Hatred is a human trait, not spiritual.
Conflict brings recognition and combination through trial. It's important

C: I am an anarchist but only because I have seen what civilization has done to my brethren, I hate god but only because I want to give humans so much more that I know we can have.

A: My observation leads me to believe that you are saying "I ( meaning you) can think this way, because I mean well, and you can not because I assume that you’re twisted, and I am not listening to what you are actually saying". This is what a lot of people do to me.

C: Life is power and I want to live. The dead no one thing, that it is better to be alive.

A: With respect, may I ask how you know what the dead are thinking. Have you been to the realm of death? Have you become dead? The dead do not weep for lack of life, they weep because they are born.
Death is power. To hold the power of death in life, is power!!! Death shows us how to live, if we are to remain on earth for a time.

C: I have seen those who embrace the dark and it is too malicious and detached from compassion for me.

A: I possess more compassion now than I did before my journey.

C: do you acknowledge those children of the light might know something you dont and vice versa.
These people may have honed some trivial skills which I have not, but they do not know more than I do, provided that they have not known darkness. I have skipped over some pleasantries because I wanted to get right to the heart of the matter. Everything that is important and that which must be mastered and dealt with, I will learn. But will they?

Q. On your site, you speak much of your experiences in the Underworld, how they affected you, what you saw there, etc. But the real question is this: How does one actually enter the Underworld? Is this is a secret to be divulged by spirits when one is ready, or is it achieved by some ritual where one goes into an altered state of mind?


A: That's a heavy question. I will try to sum it up. Yes, I have devoted an entire book to the process it takes to get there. Its a process, stages of awareness and a change in consciousness. But its real, this change in awareness lets you see things and learn things that others cannot see or know. The spirits are the ones who bestow you with the capacity to start this process. A ritual alone will do nothing. A ritual performed by the right person will help with the shifting awareness, but over a period of time. It took me about three years before I entered.

Q. Dear Jyade,
.. Believe me there are so many questions that Id like to ask you since there are not too many people who have achieved the spiritual state that you have and your website is very breathtaking and awesome. I truly concur with you about how you stated on dealing with spirits such as respect and afterall it is everything. I still have some inquiries for you so if you don't mind here I go.

1.) What ever happens to atheists or religious people once they have ceased to live physically on this plane of existence which we call earth? And how do they differ and are similar to one another?
A: It’s all about evoloution. One can evolve on earth- in life, or in death and the underworld. Sometimes one is not capable of doing it in life, so they will have to do it in death or vice verse. It doesnt matter if someone is christian, atheist, satanist, scientist, or Joe shmoe. you do not need religion or god to evolve. Its up to you, what happens to you in your life time and what you plan on doing about it. It also depends upon if your ready for it.

2.) You once stated to me that Jesus's Death was a universal myth, but is his name ever used in some practices of black magic?

A: Its a tricky thing. I make reference to him quite often. This is because I know more about what the message is now than I did when I was christian for all those years. Just because I understand doesn’t mean that everyone I deal with will. This gets ugly. I do not refer to him as the savior or god or in any way that a Christian might. Whether he was indeed a historical figure or just mythological is not important. Its the real message. However, the message is this: life, death, suffering, descending to hell and then becoming immortal/ rebirth. Thats the message. Not all of the other stuff that the bible is filled with. Since people are the ones who wrote about the story, they managed to screw it up. They also included what was relevant to their time and culture. This has no significance in our day. I hate christianity for all of the evil it has inflicted upon the world. It has made a big mess of our world..for a very long time, that's why I do not like making reference to jesus, I dont want to screw anyone up, but he’s also a very known figure. I have heard other people discuss him without losing their minds also. I have seen beyond hype, therefore I can speak freely of what I observe.
Also, the message of life, death, imortality is a universal myth as I told you before. It is ancient! The christians didn’t think of it by them selves. Its been around longer than jesus and pals.
5.) Once a person dies physically do they ever reincarnate and come back to life? What about someone who has been successful with Black Magic such as yourself, will you ever reincarnate back to this world ?
See #1 for this . Reincarnation will have to do with that and how long it takes you or if its an option for you to come back here to do it.
Will I be coming back? No way. I’ve had enough, I’m done now.

4/21/01

Q: ..but eventually there are a few doubts in my head. How hard is it to enter the Underworld? and how hard is it to survive to it? you seem to have had a hard and painful path. is it because you had few preparation (I mean this as there was no person to tell you what you would have to go through and to tell you how strong you would have to be) or is it as hard and painful to everyone? and, when you say there in your section "winter darkness" that you started to cut yourself with a razor and stuff, was that a real thing, or just a metaphor? isn't it dangerous to really lose your life (the human body life too)? you see, I am sorry to bug you with my doubts, it's just because I have no one to turn to, except you, while I am in this as I call "preparation process"; where I am losing my fear of seeing and interacting with them, and to undergo, and also getting my intentions straight to myself before I get my intentions straight to them. Thank you!

A: It is very hard to enter the UW, but not impossible. This will depend upon you and them alone. It’s their show and their decision.
Yes, I had and still have it hard. This is due to the fact of my position. I do not think it will be this brutal for all, but it just might be, so be prepared. Also it’s true , I had no one to talk to or ask about these things. I did this by myself, with ‘their’ help only, and there was a big reason for this as I was to find out much later on. If you have a "map" it will not be as frightening, because you will know what to expect. I thought I was going crazy. I had no idea what the hell was going on. Very brutal.
The razor was real, so was all of the blood and all the scars I now sport. Trying to explain what happened that day is not even possible. It transpired on two separate planes/ dimensions at the same time. I can’t even begin to explain the situation. I don’t have the word capacity to do it.
It might not happen like that for other people. Yes, you have to pay the price to get in. For me it was real, real blood, for others.. I can’t say. It might only be symbolic. It’s possible. Everything that happens/happened to me was real though. This is my luck ‘-) Again, this is because of who I am and what I am doing. They are real and this whole thing is real, it’s not only metaphor or symbology. You can physically talk to them, you can actually see them. It’s not what people expect or are used to. I can guarantee that the majority of the people involved with the occult have never really seen them. They only wish they could, and then when someone like me comes along, they think I am nuts. It’s really amusing.
It’s a very strange and beautiful thing. Very strange. It’s awesome in the true sense of the word. Utterly awesome! Incredible and very beautiful. The UW is a beautiful place. After you get used to it, you will not want to leave. Nothing in this world can compare to it. Nothing.


If you do not want to die, then yes this whole thing can be very dangerous. Some that enter do not make it out. There are no guarantees. It’s up to you.
It’s good that you are in the "prep process". It shows that you’re thinking it through and taking it seriously. Applause! Remember, there is no rush. If you prepare yourself you will have less problems. The more you work with them before hand, the more they will help you and tell you when it’s time. Do not rush the process, that’s where the real danger lies.

C: Today, I stumbled upon your writings on the web. Without going into massive detail, your ideals are refreshing because so few have seen the true context of a higher being, and the relationships within life.
I salute you in respect of your journey completed and continuing...
Applause again .. You explain things very well. Though, I see the cattle have a hard time with it.
Many respects.


C: I have read your whole site and I must say it is one of the best out there.
I can see you have so much knowledge that the world will never see. I love your ranting page it's f*cking hilarious because we have the same views and it is very frustrating to repeat your self.

4/21/01

Q: Hello! I want to ask you something really important: does black magic kill other people?
because I am beginning to practice black magic, and just a week after I got serious with the black magic, my boyfriend got into a fight (which has never happened before) and the other guy said that the thing wasn't over yet, and that he would try to kill him (my boyfriend).
So, is this just a coincidence, or does black magic actually kill people that have nothing to do with it? I was wondering if it could be a testing... and when you said that "the demons will ruin your life when you call upon them", do they kill other people? because I don't think that the people that have nothing to do with black magic should die because of it... so, please, answer me as soon as you read this email!

A: I am answering this letter because it represents the classic hysteria that is associated with black magic.

Black magic does not kill people. Don't think it's your fault, because you cannot control what other people do ( as in the guy that started the fight). If you think you are accountable, its sorta like thinking someone cursed you, even if they didn't, and you end up placing a self imposed curse upon yourself anyhow.
Yes, its probably a coincidence.
You wouldn’t be tested in this way or this fast. But it might teach you to 'get a grip' ;-)
The demons will ruin your 'life'.. this means your life will change and eventually it will be for the better. But you have to get to that point first. If someone we know dies, it has to do with them, however, the people we meet is no accident and their death will affect you.
Relax, nothing will happen to him because of anything that you do. Don’t work yourself up over this, ok.

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